how does it feels like to have Z around the whole day?

frankly, incredibly, amazingly, i still love it. i feel like immersing myself in the company of him everyday. it’s only 6 days more and counting.

today is crammed with shrieks and laughter, my new silent screams whenever he start his tickling attacks (i have resort to keeping my noise level down cos we got complained for being too noisy), eclipse mints in peppermint, hot milo from Coffee and Toast in the morning (my treat cos i owe Z a coffee) and Macs of chicken mcnuggets, fries and green tea, SWOONS.

we did loads of talking too, he being too tired cos he stayed up last night to coax me out of my emo-ness while teaching his sister maths, and i being grumpy cos of the blues and those emo leftovers. i was telling him, i hate him cos he always have the answers to everything, he is always so logical, calm and practical. his answers are always that frigging standard, like something copied and printed ten times from a textbook. he says thats becos he dont know what i’m asking. he knows i want to hear a particular answer, but since he doesnt understand what i’m asking, what i’m rambling about, he couldnt give it to me. - thats the kind of person he is to me; someone who is always so collected, always right on track. but he assures me he is not, he is just picking up the pieces and driving himself forward. everyone has his moments, he says.

i am his admirer.

today, i held on his hand a little longer than usual, i was so afraid to let go. i dont want to let go. 6 days more. i cant imagine how it will feel like without him nagging beside me, calling me childish and stupid, laughing at me, mocking me, his flashes of amused smiles, images of him clutching his stomach and laughing, him telling me stories, or any knowledge that i find so incredibly impressive cos he knows so much. there are endless things about him that i can go on discovering forever, like a present that will take ages to finish unwrapping.

6 more days, i have to keep my feelings in check.

what should be coming to an end, is unstoppable. now, 45% maybe?

-

currently reading Anybody Out There by Marian Keys and i’m lovin’ it :)