my thursday and friday this week have both been awesome days :)

thursday kick off with this damn annoying phone call from a 69 year old woman, who claims she is a woman but her voice totally suggests otherwise!!! deep throaty manly voice, is she trying to kid me? anyway i was so pissed off cos she kept harping on why i send her the letter and am i trying to ask trouble from her? #%^%$# in the first place, if you dont call up to say you want to appeal, would i even bother to send you a piece of paper that i’ve just waste 5 minutes of my life to type, check, print, fold, slot and seal? think again, you crazy she-man.

but i was happy cos the problem was all settled and KY taught me bridge after that in the office. we played 3 rounds during lunch in the kopitiam and it was rather fun.. despite my noobs moments of asking constantly which cards i should put =x. after lunch, it was really slacked and we gathered around to talk. moments like these are really <3. this is what i will miss when our contract ends and we will just head off to different lives after that. sad, isnt it? but this is life - no banquet will last forever. i should know that there is nothing in life that i cannot learn to put down.

dinner at new york new york with class gang and we watched Hulk after that. though not everyone showed up, i had my fill of fun.

during the movie, i sat between J and S. somehow, i was incredibly conscious and acutely aware that i’m sitting between the two guys that i’ve been rather fond of and vice versa. it was scary, and it feels abit surreal, like this kind of situations only happens in imaginations. but yet, it happened last night. i like it how S would wait for me in the mrt station without me asking, so we can go to the e-hub together. i like how J would smile at me and say he didnt fall asleep for the first time in movies cos i was sitting beside him; i like it how he would msg me the moment i got off the bus with S. i like it when S insisted on sending me home. - sighed. complicated isnt it? and then, there was the conflicting feelings i had for Z. i think i’m just asking for trouble when it comes to relationship problems. but frankly speaking, after this 10 sentences MSN chat i had with Z just a minute ago, the feelings i had towards him doesnt seems so strong like the last time when my heart will start thumping excitedly upon seeing his window blink. - really a crush perhaps. right now, it just feels fun to make him annoyed with me. i’m getting really addicted to doing that. resulting in a series of shrieks when he poked me out of irritation hahahaha.

today at work, he called me 3 times, yes again, cos i took the morning off to submit the school fees for Econs course with Mum. they waited for me for lunch, how nice. :) i just feel that it’s weird, these feelings i could have for all these guys in my life. - K, JL, G, S, J, E, and now, Z. - more than one at the same time. i dont know what am i really seeking, what do i really want. this remains a question mark. i’m looking for perfection, perfection that doesnt exists so shoot me please. or slap me awake.

it’s hard to imagine how at one point or moment in my life, i could have some happiness solely belonging to me but i just choose to run and hide. the cowardy way.

say hello to this fickled coward.

-

and yes, it’s FINALLY concluded that i’m going to take up Diploma in Econs this august. suck it in and work it out!

i simply cannot disappoint. - there’s no turning back. i had my blood down on that cheque with the 4-figured number.

p.s. J just says i’m skinny! i find it amusing i dont know why :)

someone who compliments me frequently - seriously, i could get used to this. you’re spoiling me for wanting more.