it’s back to school today and already, i made a foolish mistake of not asking my mates if there’s tutorial in the morning (cant they remind me too? HAR HAR HAR?!) and hence, i blindly hopped onto a cab, thinking i’m real late when i’m, in fact, TWO hours way earlier. so i reached the class, pushed opened the door and realized the room is in semi-darkness and not a single familiar face in sight. and to think i thought i went in the wrong class! so, i hurriedly closed the door and went next door to check.. but it turns out that i’m right for once but those in the room arent my groupmates but other people getting ready for their own ppt. a call answered by my sleepy friend that the class, indeed dont need our presence today. and so hurray, i wasted 6 bucks on cabfare!

oh well. luckily, i got stuff to do, or else i will definitely flared up. :(

so i,

♥ submit my resume/cover letter/job ad
♥ print copies of my MC
♥ drop by library and slacked there with a very funny book, Queen of Babble by Meg Cabot
♥ submit my MC

and finally, meet friend for lecture, which is pretty boring and empty. and thereafter, we

♥ went and concluded our BB presentation! yay

afterwhich,

♥ dear old Napfa :( which out of the 5 sections, i failed 3 hahahaha :( there, the proof that my bones are growing stiff and heavy! especially i was feeling rather sick and headachy after the 2.4 run. thank goodness that will be the last time ever i’m doing this! come to think of it, how the hell did i manage to get gold/silver/bronze for all those primary/secondary years were beyond my imagination, heh. we finished the test at evening, around 7pm plus. so very sweaty, so very beat.

-

i find humans beings very queer indeed. today, i was listening to my friends’ conversation and one of them was ranting to the other about her father/family, saying how they dont help out in housework yada, dont give allowance yada, and it got me thinking, what if something happened to their fathers/family - would they still rant about him like that? wont they want to remember only the person’s good things and kick away the bad? will they? wont we all? humans are like that arent we. is it the guilt seeping in, or the regrets kicking in? .. or probably both? tell me, i would like to know; if what had happened to me, happens to someone else, what and how would that someone feel?

for me, it’s abit of both and additionally, the unspoken love; and then, i realized i had never felt more overwhelmed.

when my time comes
forget the wrong that i’ve done
help me leave behind
some reasons to be missed

and dont resent me
when you’re feeling empty
keep me in your memory

leave out all the rest

x

I love you, Pa. please believe me, i really really do.