Oh yay, I’m back home(:

A miserable day, thankfully, ended quite happily. I was totally feeling emo since late afternoon and I felt like I would bite anyone who come to harrass me at that moment. All because of that MissLong, secretary of Tantan. She’s just a secretary, opened doors for Tantan and she still has so much to say? Sadly, she’s going to be in charge of the NUH Project too, along with Mdm Ng. I foresee manymanymany more emo-days because of her! She has opinions for everything. From layout, to, just EVERYTHING. Nagged this, nagged that, sounding like a Miss-Know-It-All. I hate this kind of woman! This is the first day we were officially introduced and I hate her already.

Sigh..

You just dont understand, or maybe laughing it off is your way of soothing me. But it doesnt work, boy. Somehow, I thought you’ll bitch about her together with me, but you didnt. Tell me a joke, anything. Either that or I’m really too sensitive to get annoyed over tiny things. I probably am. But I’m still oh so pissed with her. Worse still, Mdm Ng is acting like she agreed with every single word Ms Know-It-All uttered. Dont you have your own mind, Mdm Ng? At first you agreed with us; then come along a MsLong and you completely changed your words. AH, WHY LIKE THAT? I dont understand these teachers. And now, we got many things to edit because of her visit, not to mention many more researches to be done!

Speechless.

The stresses are finally coming, threatening to drain me dry when work already had. :(

And now, tomorrow is the launching of LS GSS. The First Big Day. Busy, busy, gonna be sooooo busy. I’m leading a busy life right now but it’s not the life I want. I hardly go out with friends anymore. The only lunches that we go together are lunches during schooltime; and we only gossiped about what shopping we had done with other people and not with one another. It’s like, in school we are - "Hey, we’re best of friends!"; but once the clocking-out hour arrives, we are - "Bye! See you tomorrow!" - and quickly disappear down the corner. I do that too, because I have to rush off to work; My friends do that too because they had something on. Mostly boyfriends issues. (Yes, I’m the only one currently not attached. Yay or nay? Haha!) So you see? It’s like our lives are split into two. I cant remember our last outing together. Probably in Year2. And I cant remember alot memories of us outside. All I can remember mostly are the times we spent in school doodling over lecture notes and staring blankly at computers. LOL. Pathetic or what?

Once you sit down and started pondering over this, you’ll realize. It just strucks you. I dont normally think such stuff to such extreme but I do now, because today is Emo Day. I truly missed the entire class. What fun we used to have. And yes, I’m saying these wistfully.

No one probably realized it but me. Maybe they think there’s no point, maybe it didnt matter to them. Then, ohwells. I’m being emo. :(

I was quiet throughout the beginning of work. When I arrived, they were all busy doing the setting of the shop for tomorrow’s GSS. It looked like the first opening of the shop where everything was slashed with.. everything. Racks jammed full, hangers not enough, basket filled to the brim. Ah.. I hate sights like these. Plus my emo mood, and plus my jaw still aches and I still winced at every twitch of my cheek muscles, I decide to remain mute. No interest in their conservations, no feelings for anything. For me, being emo is like I’m a walking statue. Outside I looked dead but inside my head, feelings/thoughts/words were flying left and right, zooming around like an aeroplane. Very depressed feeling.

Because I was thinking about work the next day.. and the next day.. and the next day. I truly have no life now.

But luckily, my mood begins to pick up about 2hours later. I even texted him how his day was, hoping his words could bring in some happiness. And indeed, he didnt disappoint me(: Hehe. And what makes a Happy Combo is that an item that I want will be 40% off! Whee!

Recently, I have this weird feeling. Scrolling down my list of contacts, it’s really kind of pathetic to say that there is not alot of people I would like to whine to when I’m feeling lonely and depressed. I never thought I was those anti-social kind of person but this weird feeling I had got me thinking - am I one? I loved to make friends. But I guess, at the right time, at the right place, at the right mood.

I’m so friends-deprived.

It had been 1year4months22days and I’m still thinking of you. What’s missing? I wonder. The sun still rises in the east and sets in the west. The moon still comes after the sun sets. The flowers still continue to bloom and did not die. Everyday is still a 24-hour routine. I still sleep on the top bunk bed. I still have long hair and didnt grow an inch. I still have my hello kitty blanket that I like to huddle underneath every night. So, what’s missing? You’re happy and I’m almost happy. I still went to school everyday at the same time and came home drained and dry every night. I’m still me. The same me that you left and the same me when we first met. So what’s the loss? The loss of you?

And the one word that came into my mind was..

Loneliness.