Gosh, to begin this post, I just wanna say - I LOVE VECTOR ART! It’s so style, so pretty and so, wow lah. :D! In fact, I love vector art so much right now that I’ve decide to do a layout on it :) Of course, provided I can resize and find a picture I like the best! Yay! I’ve already spotted like, 12478568 pretty ones. But here comes the hard part - making it fits your layout. Argh, a challenge is here! Click click click, so WOW LAH!! Haha, I’m going crazy over it.

Anyway, I just came home from.. STEAMBOAT! Yummylicious, super-delicious alrights! And I’m happy that Mako loves it :D We went to the Bugis steamboat place called Chong Qing, which was beside the one we last went the last time with the class. Chicken and Tom-yum soup is love! The highlight was the fuzhou’s meatballs, very yummy when dipped into the tom-yum soup! Oh man, I can still taste the sweetness of it, haha. We were all so bloated by the end of it.. but we didnt eat the $12.80 worth! :( Next time, we’ll forgo lunch and go again alrights? :D Thank you Rene and Mako for the nice night out! <3

I think Mako is very very sweet girl. That was my first impression of her when I first saw her standing in front of the lab with another Japanese guy during the holidays and till now, it is still my impression of her. Never mind the communication problem we had at first (because I speak too chimly and she dont understand what I’m talking about, and vice versa), it got better at the end of the day. And I found out that she is a fan of Deathnote and Nana like me too! ;) She even likes the same song from Nana Movie - Glamorous Sky -  as me!! Sweet or what?! :):) Haha. We took Bus 12 back together and it had a nice feeling to it. Funny thing is she loves Singapore and I told her how about we swapped - I love Japan!! Hahaha, and she readily agreed lah! :) So cute.

After Mako alighted at her stop, I put on my earphones and the first song that played was Li Sheng Jie’s Chi Xin Jue Dui AGAIN. Haha! I love that song though, it simply so heart-felt. Followed by Zhui Jing which makes me wanna cry. Moments like this, spent on the bus, especially at night when you had your earphones on, blocking you out of the world, watching the cars and flashlights went by, was such an indescribeable feeling. It feels calm, lonely and so out-of-the-world at the same time. Like, that moment seems frozen in time and you’re just alone with the sad music playing in the background. And these kind of moments made me think alot. Once I had my earphones on, I become another person, bounded in my own world, lost in my own thoughts.

"You seems traumatised.", commented a friend a while ago.

And you bet I was shocked after i heard this. Never ever had a friend would use that word to describe me. I wondered the truthness in it. Was it simply a comment, or was it a fact which I dont wish to admit? Being "traumatised" seems so.. weak somehow. So not me. But that word made me pause at that moment he remarked it and it made me paused now as I wrote about it. Maybe he was right. I was. This would explains why I shunned away from making new friends, pinned on old ones and avoid talking about the more private side of my life - my real thoughts and feelings. I kept it away from friends’ eyes, pretending that all is well, everything’s fine.

"You okay? Is everything alright?"
"Yeah, I am.. *insert smile here* I’m just.. tired."

Oh wells. That’s just me.. being emo. In the end, a tiring day ends and a new day unfolds..

On the last note, I dont bother to ask you again today, because I already know your answer. (oh, surprise, surprise)

 

"Damn cute lah.."

These 3 words made my day. Thank you. :*)

Monday had went and Tuesday had arrived.. and now Tuesday is ending soon and it’s going to be Wednesday.. How fast time flies really! Monday I had those blues again, and you know how it is like; to drag your ass to school early in the morning, and off to work after that yada yada.. Totally TIRING. :( And I’ve been looking for a bottled version of nescafe coffee but so farrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! - to no avail :( I need coffeee! I want coffeee! *chants*

To sum it all, school has been a drag, and let us just say that work has its happy moments. Those lame jokes and laughter is what gets me going.. like lunch times are what gets me going in school.. =X Life’s very peaceful right now, very slack at times and often, I’m at loss at what direction I’m going at, and work should be stress-free since I wasnt a full-timer and sales are fun because I’m a cheap-skater! Haha! But I have those RAHHHHHHHH moments. Alot, alot. I’m so emo. :(

Had pastamania with Char tonight - We shared Ham&Mushroom pizza, oh love! But we were so so so full after that ;) But the dinner was great, yummy food! Haha, againagain! And after dinner, The Pirates of Carribean :)) I think it’s superrrr nice; though many people commented otherwise, but I loved it! It’s so funny, sweet, sad and the graphics were amazing.. I’m surprised we didnt fall asleep at all! The movie ended around 1045pm, almost 3 hours! But I think I can watch it again and not get sick of it - Jack, Will and Elizabeth just rocks! Wheee! Happyfied!! :D

Fall asleep in school alot of times today. Going out to eat steamboat with Rene and Mako tomorrow! I’m kinda looking forward though I have work the next day in the morning.

And another thing is, I’m scared of the way I handled money sometimes. I simply started spending recklessly whenever I got abit more of cash.. Isnt it a scary thing? I wanna save up.. and there’s this sky-high feeling of seeing your bank account’s figures multiplied.. Really exciting! :D But, I really need to control the way I flick the silver card. No more buying and spending on unnecessary stuff! Please, please, please. I wanna save up for rainy days.. :( Arghhh!

Been feeling kinda blue these days.. I looked at you and wonder why..

I dont miss you,
I got it clear now.
All I missed was, the feeling of being with you.
But it’s so confusing.
I’m always confusing this 2 different things together,
and making it sound like I’m missing you.

But fact is, I dont.
It had been too far long to miss a person who I’ve blocked since so longlong ago..

But, I wished when you had someone, I had one too.

- "It’s best to wait for the one you want than settle for one that’s available."

How very true, dontcha think?

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I did something terribly stoopid again. *groan*

I dont feel like mentioning it here because it’s really, simply, totally, ridiculously and incredibly stoopid.

ARGHHHHHHHH.

Now, tell me why am I always stoopid things? *Moan*

*takes deep breath*

Okay, the stoopid thing of the day was..

I opened my locker door.
Found out that that cat has used MY locker again and has kindly left her gigantic vodavoda water bottle inside.
Threw her bottle back into her 4th locker irritably (Hurrays, I’m so nice:D)
Happily threw my bag inside MY locker.
Took out my jeans and tee.
(for this moment of time, I dont know what I’ve done alrights. It’s like, this memory is erased, I cant remember what happened!! >:( )
Wanted to change.
Suddenly looked down at my hands. I’m only holding my jeans! Where’s my tee?!?!
Looks down..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
and found it inside the pail of DIRTY MOP WATER THAT HASNT BEEN CHANGE FOR DAYS!!!!!!

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Hmm. I’m starting to suspect I know what’s bothering her already.

Ooops. Please. Dont let this be true.

*

I’m feeling calmer right now.

So I should blog more while I can right?

Since tomorrow I’ll be too zombified to blog anymore.

But I have nothing interesting to write about leh. Oh wait. A Happy Birthday to one of the special girlies in my life! I have texted her a birthday sms this morning but I’m not in person to wish or celebrate with her. Which feels quite weird and funny indeed. All along, we this gang of special girlies will meet up every year for a birthday celebration for the 2 May babies. But this year, none of us initiated a meetup. I supposed everyone is currently juggling their own school/work life to care or remember anymore. This kind of things always happens. I should probably just let it be. I have asked her how she is celebrating this special day a few days ago. And she happily replied that of course she is taking the day off to celebrate with friends.

Which means her choice of "friends" to celebrate this day with, arent us this gang of special girlies anymore. :(

Time really makes people drifted apart.. I guess sometimes we just have to let nature takes its course. But on the other hand, I wondered why couldnt I be the one who ask her out instead?

"Hey! How about meeting today to celebrate your birthday? x)"

Is that a question to hard to ask? Hmmm. I’m just afraid that a)what if she has other friends she wanna spend it with and b) wont I be the one making it hard for her to tell me? c) and she might be a dilemma because she scare it’ll hurt my fragile feelings..

So in the end it’s better if i dont ask.

No matter what, I’m glad I remembered this day! It had hurt so much when people dear to me dont remember my birthday.

Happy Sassy-Sweet 19, dear Friend! :)

*

Today is a day we zhuo bo again. :D

Next week we gonna SOOO die. Received an email from Mdm Ng that Steven Tan is gonna check on our progress next week!! DIE, DIE, DIEEEE! :( So far we only completed like, 1/2 of what was asked to be done? Zhe mo ban ahhhhhh. I feel like continuing ranting about school, about work but it’s getting so boring isnt it? Talking about the same old stuff everyday. I write also write till bored already.

Guess which group is up on the duty roster for next week?! (Yes, we have a duty roster tacked on the wall by Steven Tan. so secondary school!)

USSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

Next week is gonna be such a shitty week for all of us. Imagine clearing up after people’s rubbish.. and emptying the rubbish bag in the bigbig rubbish disposal. Eww! >:(Somemore we have to be the last to leave!

Luckily next week there are only 4 days of school!

My life sucks so much right this moment. To prove it, today was the day I can come home right after school. I should be very happy right? Indeed I am. Very. At first. And then what have to happen? (It just happened halfway I started blogging)

Sister unhappy, xavier getting sickish, Mom worrying, Sister get pissed and starts to shout, Dad get pissed, found ants in xavier’s basket of clothes and have to kill them one by one with Mommy, and I got pissed because of the commotion around me. In the end, everyone was really pissed, I was even pisser and am fuming silently right now as my off day is officially ruined.

To make the matter worse till cannot be worse, Kakak just called me and asked me if I could work full tomorrow. In my haste of anger/piss-ness/frowns, I said yes immediately.

Maybe I jinxed everything because I’m at home tonight. So I should work more right? Work till I can hardly breathe, work till I have no more energy to think, work till I can just come home and sleep straight away without communicating with anyone after work.

Brilliant plan.

Shit, I do hope that I dont regret. I’m really regretting right now, and it’s only 5 minutes after the call. I cant stand myself for doing at least something stupid everyday. Seriously, I have no patience whatsoever. Arrrgghhhh. What a LOUSY day. Plus i got shouted at just now:"Why you inside the room also?!!" Grrrrrr, I’M SO VERY PISSED. It’s not my fault okay. I dont even know what happened and I got pulled into this? $%^&#$@@#!!!

I shall keep calm. Calm, calm, calm..

ARGHHHHHHHHHH, FULL TOMORROW. Am I crazy or what?!!!!!!

I’m even more pissed right now.

2007 is a lousy freaky year so far. Nothing good has happened. *SCREAMSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*

I just feel like.. crawling under my blanket and hibernate like a bear.

Yes, waking up in Year 2008 seems such a fantastic idea suddenly.

Come on! View my masterpiece :D

(click to enlarge!)

LOLLLL! The above is a test called DrawAHouse and after drawing, it’ll shows a result of your personality.

Yes, DRAW A HOUSE.

and i somehow read it to DRAW A "HORSE".

Thus explains the horse above! -.-

*speechless*

HAHAHA, IT’S SO FUNNY LAH. I laugh till now I so hot!

And my result was:

(click to enlarge!)

*

HAHAHAHAHAHA. I doubt the truthness of this test, because obviously, a HORSE is not supposed to be included. A HOUSE was!

Okay, I had done something stupid today again.

and this is only Thursday’s Stupid Incident No.2

*

The Stupid Incident No.1 was..

I lost my way in TP.

Alrights. I actually intended to come home, showered, eat leftovers, and blogged longlong.

But then, I made a harsh decision to come online which results in me talking vigourously with 3 lovely friends. VIGOUROUSLY!! Meaning a real long chat, switching windows as fast as my fingers could possibly allows me. And now, my head is getting woozy, head spinning and eyes squinting.

Mommy says I’m too tired. She says I worked too much.

My friends watched me head straight to work almost everyday after school. They tried to cheer me up by saying I’ll have more money to spend.

I dont know. I dont know what will happen if I just carry on working like that; every weekend was devoted to work, at least 3 out of 5 weekdays I’m devoted to work too. So.. what’s left? On my off days I felt that I should go home and rest and sleep away, to have energy for work the next day; So, let’s celebrate. Because I officially have no life now. No social life, no fun hang-outs. Hey wait.. I have no life ever since I happily stepped into LS, thinking it’s my stairway to heaven aka, a bundle of cash. But then, as times go, it turn out very much like a hell. But of course I’m thankful that my friendships there that are definitely improving - Can you believe that Kiwi and I could have fun working together? We do now, in fact! Life’s crazy. Life’s.. unpredictable would be the right word.

There are so many things going through my mind right now. Stacks and stacks of to-do lists, layers and layers of thoughts meant to be sorted out before they drove me crazy. Why ah? Why it seems to be only me? I wished so much that I dont care and dont give a damn. But.. somehow, my personality seems to be fixed this way. I dont know to smile, to laugh, or to cry.. it all seems wrong.. somehow.

Sometimes it seems that I’m making my life complicated and not the other way round.

Why.. Why AH?

Yum, supper is always love(: wells! Back home, havent bathe (=x), still in my school clothes, oily face, fresh clothes on my lap, my stomach bloated from the delicious egg mee suah (heated up by Mommy with <3), the fan blowing at my direction is my current status right now. Last song that played when i got home was err, Will You Marry Me? :) And I’m feeling so so super happy suddenly.

Work wasnt as disastrous as I thought it would be, because I’m working with Kiwi, running a 2-girl show, ugh and with sales still up and going fiercely, we need more girlpower than the usual nights. But phew, WE SURVIVED NICELY THANK YOU VERY MUCH! Heh. Argh, I’m feeling very sticky right now, so let’s take a short commercial break - I got SOOO MUCH TO RANT ABOUT! =) *runs away*

.
.
.

BACK!

And I smelled like a baby now.. :D

Today lunch was one of favourite - Kway Chap! Heh, a cheap dollar and eighty cents you get to buy a bowl of happiness and warmth. Why? Eating Mensa’s kway chap always gave me a sense of happiness, something warm and fuzzy, something really comfortable. I’m clueless about the magic of it too, but it just simply give me the feeling. I felt happy, you know, xin fu de gan jue? HAHA. This is so silly but it’s true for me(: Try it!

And so, Dayah, Ping and I spent the morning dreading Mdm Ng’s arrival (we just KNOW she’s going to come and view our progress) and we made up stories to tell her, since nothing much was accomplished. =X I suggested flipping one of the thickthick books that we borrowed opened and put it in front of us and pretend to keep frowning at the screen - so we’ll look like very studious and hardworking artists at work. LOL! Clever right? Hah, Dayah and I were busy finishing our week4 report to email her because it’s wednesday again and I was determined to make mine as long as possible! Though if you read carefully, they are literally all crap! Ahems. :*)

I’m also happy because lots of people were chatting me up on MSN and keeping me busy (: Truly appreciated, my friends! And and, I spent the entire day reading up on a particularly lovely blog. I spent yesterday reading up on another one too, and it’s like a blog a day keep me busy? =D

Anyways, this afternoon, after lunch, we noticed that lots of students were wearing grauduates outfits and each carrying a red book which I recognized is the Grads Book. So we speculate that today must be Graduation Day! Awwww.. :(

"I cant wait for the day to arrive", Ping was saying.

".. I dreaded that day." I said. :(:(:(

WHY? I guess Graduation Day in poly must be everyone’s dream. Well, excluding mine. I dont wish to go university, and if I really did not go university, doesnt that means that my student life will just end like that? With no fireworks, no nothing, just something as bland as porridge. I dont feel that I’m living my poly life to the fullest. What I’ve been doing all along is just.. attending the classes, sitting for the exams, finishing the projects, getting a score.

So, that’s it?

"I went to classes and studied hard for exams." -The End-

That’s how I’m gonna conclude my student life?

How pathetic with a capital P. *ponders*

And at the moment, I wondered if I will leave footprints in anyone’s heart. At all.

 

Oh, and I should probably start writing a story of My Pathetic Student Life.

*saddified*

Accomplishments of the Day: 0

And yes indeed, we spent the 3.9999/4 of the day slacking again. I only managed to conjure up the report master page for the last half hour but Ping was able to do part of the coding. What would we do without her? (: Dayah and I were.. totally "ah, there’s still tomorrow!" mood. HAHA. We went library today, dropped off 3 books and came back with another 4.. oh wow. Imagine us sitting on the library carpeted floor, in between shelves, high up in level8 with our heads burrowed in thickthick books!  Nerd Alert!

The day zipped by in a whirl and funny, I dont have much memories of what I did mostly in labs.. except that lunch was chicken cutlet loveee and that zhang dong liang’s songs keep playing in my head. Currently, FIR’s Qi Shi Ni Hen Ai Ta is on repeat mode in my ipod. The song just.. speaks. So, so real. So heartbreakingly so. I seemed to enjoy injecting more pain into my heart, eh? HAHA.

Things seems to be looking up all around. I finallyfinallyfinalllyyyyyy plucked up my courage and went to my opitcian just now. Just to check my left eye. Which, I was supposed to check months ago but i was too cowardy and freak out every time at the mention of it. Even the opitician was amazed that the last time i saw him was january! :D Heh, I hereby thanked god for the good news - It’s healed!! But wait, there are bad news to come.

"I’m afraid that there are residue still in your eye. Those scars might never go away.."

*heart immediately breaks*

Sigh, what did you expected, addy? This was the outcome I already knew.. so what exactly was I hoping? Damaged was done fullstop. I can only seek consolence in $105/month daily lens.. or $300/1.5years hard lens.. He asked me to think carefully about it, so I left the shop with a mixture of emotions whirling inside me. Being able to go back to contacts has been one of my greatest wishes since forever. Since I was left scarred in the left eye? Now, I can fulfill the wish but I was afraid that by doing so, another (choychoychoyyyyyyyy!) infection will return just like the other 3 times..

I freaking hate that.

Life’s full of risks. If I never tried, how would I know right? Oops am I consoling myself? =X I’ll give myself a few more days to think. You betcha I’ll be thinking about this issue every minute! Hah.

I just realized the 25th this month is gonna be a veryvery special day for a specialspecial someone in my heart! :*) Are we gonna celebrate? Have to go for pressies hunting REAL FAST!! Thank goodness that’s pay day is on 26th! lovelovelovee. My face totally becomes like this whenever i drooled about 26th! $_$ Oh goodness, that dont make me completely materialistic and moneyface does it? I’m reallyreally not like that. Just that desperate measures for desperate moments! :D Muhahaha! 25th this Friday! Woots!

To conclude this random post, I really hate school these days. No motivation whatsoever. Somemore, the thumbprint device absolutely hates me. I’ve lost counts the number of times I have to tap my thumb over the screen thingy! It’s seriously getting me annoyed. Rawr! And because of that, I jam up the queue behind me. Sooooo embarrassing kays! >:( I hate school due to the lousy I’m-so-sick food. If it’s not chicken cutlet, it’s carbonara pasta, kway chap, yong tau foo, malay stall rice (with the same dish EVERYTIME), curry cutlet rice, claypot rice - WHAT’S NEW?

Sighed. I got this love/hate relationship with school! Alrights, I swear that I will be off to bed before 12pm every night and I’m gonna stick to this and make it a permanent routine! Say byebye to eyebags/circles whee! I slept 10hours yesterday after dropping dead from work =) Tonight shall be DAY NO.2 of sleeping early!

And oh oh, anyone in mood for LJS brekkie and NYDC baked rice?!?!

MEMEMEMEMEMEEEE! =D

Been feeling emo these days right? I read back my past entires I felt more depressed. Whatever’s happening?

Whatever happen to shorter posts?
Whatever happen to happy thoughts, smiles?
Whatever happen to friends?
Whatever happen to love?

"Pick a day I date you okayy!! We go shopping! (:"

"Haha, where got time. Later I going la."

 

Tell me now, who need friends like this? I’m sadded and hurt by that remark. But it’s okay, this isnt the first time anyway. Freak. I should stop being so damn sensitive. And suddenly, I felt top of the world today. Reason being, I cant go on like that forever. Emo-ing everyday, feeling so upset everyday, feeling shitty everytime in school or at work, and worse still, no one sensing it, felt like hell. Reallyreallyreally. I should perk myself up, pull up my hair and strive from being the best I can be. (:

This will be the first baby step I’m telling myself to get on with.

The best is yet to come, though it’s taking a really long time.

I’m taking a break now, from feelings, thoughts, heartbreak.

Think no more!

 

I have everything and I will have everything.(:

Mommy’s love is enough to keep me going. <3 My lovely family is all to keep me alive.

 

On a totally random thought, Da broke my blusher AGAIN. Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

 

I want a lover whom I dont have to love.

Friday was an awful day. Normally, it would be my favourite day of the week but this week, it’s simply.. horrible.

School
Consist of slacking, listening to BSB and A1 playlists, sleeping after lunch, chewing marshmallows dipped in chocolate fondue and drinking milo dinosaur. Both was really tasty and yummy, I adore chocolate! Someday, we gotta try chocolate buffet! CCN Day makes everywhere crowded, like wet market, with everyone yelling "3 for $1!!!" across each other.. cotton candy, nacho chips with cheese, donuts of every flavour, ben&jerry ice-cream, bubble teas, caramel apple cupcakes, muffins, brownies, cookies, ice-cream waffles, haunted house, bowling games, hamsters, baby tortoises etc.. well, you can imagine! It was an amazing spread. Love the sight of food but we were too full to try any except for the chocolate fondue thingy. I missed the last CCN. Alot, ALOT. Ohwell..

Supposed to go library after lunch to do research but we ended up not going and I ended up sleeping on the table, waking up at intervals before slumping down back to sleep again. Was so so tired. And I felt sick. Sadly, I’m not sick enough to skip work. We did not accomplish anything at all. Nada.

Work
Horrible sight when I arrived. Messy would be too nice a word to describe the scene. Rubbish dump is more like it. Boxes littered around the counter, baskets overflowing, rack jammed, customers shouting for help.. totally driving me crazy. I worked, entertained, replied questions and wrapped up items non-stop all the way. A particular customer made my already bad mood go downhill.

"Hey!!!" She hissed when I was busy hanging up items from the basket. Busy, busy okay.

"Yes? You wanna make payment?" I huffed, trying to ask nicely. I was abit out of breath from climbing up the racks in the storeroom to check stock. I had already lost count the number of times I’ve climbed that rusty thing.

"THEN?!!!!!!!"She said fiercely. "Why no people at the counter one?!?!"

"….."I was super pissed already. The whole place was in total chaos and there you are still shouting at me? B I T C H. Piss, piss, piss! Cant you ask nicely? I hate demanding customers. Sorry, the door is there.

My mood totally byebye. I assumed my face was very black and I was totally expressionless when customers starting HISSING me for attention. Cant they see that I have only 1 pair of ears and hands? And only kakak and me at work! No time to listen to senseless questions that are so obvious and no time for you to try gazillions of bras of the same size and different colour thank you very much.

Grr! No EQ or IQ at all, these people.. Try very fun is it? They can come hang themselves!

And when we FINALLY packed up and go, the very moment I stepped out of the shelter,

IT STARTED RAININGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!

O.o"

And guess what I had to do since I have no umbrella?

I went to take train down to WS and take bus from the interchange so I need not cross the road and thus can avoid the rain.

Clever and ma fan of me right? -.-

BUT, when I reached tampines area, THE RAIN HAD STOPPED, NO RAIN AT ALL!!!

DAMNNNNNATION!

What a dayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! >:(

.
.
.

And I’m veryveryvery depressed.

I need a lifesaver. ):

Got to know this sweet story from Sw. (:

Tree

People call me "Tree".

I had dated 5 girls when I was in Pre-U. There is one girl who I love alot but never dared to go after. She didn’t have a pretty face, good figure or an outstanding charm. She was just a very ordinary girl. I liked her. I really liked her. I liked her innocence, her frankness, her intelligence and her fragility. Reason for not going after her was that I felt somebody so ordinary like her was not a good match for me. I was also afraid that after we were together all the feelings would vanish. I was also afraid other’s gossip would hurt her.

I felt that if she were my girl, she’d be mine ultimately & I didn’t have to give up everything just for her. The last reason, made her accompanying me for 3 years. She watched me chase other girls, and I have made her heart cry for 3 years. She was a good actor, and me a demanding director. When I kissed my second girlfriend, she bumped into us. She was embarrassed but smiled & said, "Go on!" before running off.The next day, her eyes were swollen like a walnut. I did not want to know what caused her to cry. Later that day, I returned from soccer training to get something & watched her cry in the classroom for an hour or so. My fourth girlfriend did not like her.There was once when both of them quarreled. I know that based on her character she is not the type that will start the quarrel. However, I still sided my girlfriend. I shouted at her & ignored her feelings and walked off with my girlfriend. The next day, she was laughing & joking with me like nothing happened. I know she was hurt but she did not know deep down inside I was hurt too.

When I broke up with my fifth girlfriend, I asked her out. Later that day, I told her I had something to tell her. I told her about my breakup.Coincidentally, she has something to tell me too, about her getting together. I knew who the person was. His pursuit for her had been the talk of the School. I did not show her my heartache, just smiles & best wishes.Once I reached home, I could not breathe. Tears rolled & I broke down. How many times have I seen her cry for the man who did not acknowledge her presence?

During graduation, I read a SMS in my hp. It said, "Leaf’s departure is because of Wind’s pursuit. Or because Tree didn’t ask her to stay"

Leaf

People call me Leaf.

During the 3 years of Pre-U, I was on very close terms with a guy as buddy kind. However, when he had his first girlfriend, I learnt a feeling I never should have learnt - Jealousy. Sourness to the extreme limit. They were only together for 2 months. When they broke up, I hid my happiness. But after a month, he got together with another girl.

I liked him & I know he liked me. But why won’t he pursue me? Since he loves me why he didn’t he make the first move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my heart would hurt. After some time, I began to suspect that this was one-sided love. If he didn’t like me, why did he treat me so well? It’s beyond what you will normally do for a friend. I know his likes, his habits.But his feelings towards me I can never figure out. You can’t expect me a girl, to ask him. Despite that, I still wanted to be by his side. Care for him, accompany him, and love him. Hoping that one day, he will come to love me. Because of this, I waited for him. Sometimes, I wondered if I should continue waiting. The pain, the dilemma accompanied me for 3 years.

At the end of my 3rd year, a junior pursues me. Everyday he pursues me. He’s like the cool & gentle wind, trying to blow off a leaf from a tree. In the end, I realized that I wanted to give this wind a small footing in my heart. I know the wind will bring the leaf to a better land. Finally, leaf left the tree, but the tree only smiled & didn’t ask me to stay.

Leaf’s departure is because of Wind’s pursuit. Or cause Tree didn’t ask her to stay.

Wind

Because I like a girl called leaf. Because she’s so dependent on tree, so I have to be a gust of wind. A wind that will blow her away. When I first met her, it was 1 month after I was transferred to this new school. I saw a petite person look ing at my seniors & me playing soccer. During ECA time, she will always be sitting there. Be it alone or with her friends, looking at him. When he talks with girls, there’s jealousy in her eyes. When he looked at her, there’s a smile in her eyes. Looking at her became my habit. Just like, she likes to look at him.

One day, she didn’t appear. I felt something missing. I can’t explain the feeling except it’s a kind of uneasiness. The senior was also not there as well. I went to their classroom, hid outside and saw my senior scolding her. Tears were in her eyes while he left. The next day, I saw her at her usual place, looking at him. I walked over and smiled to her. Took out a note & gave to her. She was surprised. She looked at me, smiled & accepts the note. The next day, she appeared & passes me a note and left.

It read, "Leaf’s heart is too heavy and wind couldn’t blow her away."

"It’s not that leaf heart is too heavy. It because leaf never want to leave tree." I replied her note with this statement and slowly she started to talk to me & accept my presents & phone calls. I know that the person she loves is not me. But I have this perseverance that one day I will make her like me. Within 4 months, I have declared my love for her no less than 20 times. Every time, she will divert away from the topic. But I never give up. If I decide I want her to be mine, I will definitely use all means to win her over. I can’t remember how many times I have declared my love to her. Although I know, she will try to divert but I still bear a small ray of hope.

Hoping that she will agree to be my girlfriend. I didn’t hear any reply from her over the phone. I asked, "What are you doing? How come you didn’t want to reply?" She said, "I’m nodding my head". "Ah?" I couldn’t believe my ears. "I’m nodding my head" She replied loudly. I hang up the phone, quickly changed and took a taxi and rush to her place & press her doorbell. During the moment when she opens the door, I hugged her tightly.

Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn’t ask her to stay…

Moral
_____________________

In love, we win very rarely, but when love is true, even if you lose, you still win just for having the tingle of loving someone more than you love yourself. There comes a time when we stop loving someone, not because that person has stopped loving us but because we have found out that, they’d be happier if we let go….

Why do we close our eyes when we sleep? When we cry? When we imagine? When we kiss? This is because THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THINGS IN THE WORLD ARE UNSEEN.

There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind, but keep in mind that letting go isn’t the end of the world.
It’s the beginning of a new life. Happiness lies for those who cry those who hurt, those who have searched and those who have tried. For only they can appreciate the importance of the people who have touched our
lives.

A great love? It’s when you shed tears and still you care for them, it’s when they ignore you and still you long for them. It’s when they begin to love another and yet you smile and say, "I’m happy for you." If love fails, set yourself free, let your heart spread its wings and fly again. Remember you may find love and lose it, but when love dies, you never have to die with it.

The strongest people are not those who always win but those who stand back up when they fall. Somehow, along the course of life, you learn about yourself and realize that there should never be regrets, only a lifelong appreciation of the choices you’ve made. Loving is not how you forget but how you forgive, not how you listen but how you understand, not what you see but how you feel, and not how you let go but how you hold on.

It’s more dangerous to weep inwardly rather than outwardly. Outward tears can be wiped away while secret tears scar forever…

It’s best to wait for the one you want than settle for one that’s available. It’s best to wait for the right one because life is too short to waste on just someone.

叶子的离去是风的追逐，还是树的不挽留
葉子的離去，是風的追逐，還是樹的無挽。

Oh yay, I’m back home(:

A miserable day, thankfully, ended quite happily. I was totally feeling emo since late afternoon and I felt like I would bite anyone who come to harrass me at that moment. All because of that MissLong, secretary of Tantan. She’s just a secretary, opened doors for Tantan and she still has so much to say? Sadly, she’s going to be in charge of the NUH Project too, along with Mdm Ng. I foresee manymanymany more emo-days because of her! She has opinions for everything. From layout, to, just EVERYTHING. Nagged this, nagged that, sounding like a Miss-Know-It-All. I hate this kind of woman! This is the first day we were officially introduced and I hate her already.

Sigh..

You just dont understand, or maybe laughing it off is your way of soothing me. But it doesnt work, boy. Somehow, I thought you’ll bitch about her together with me, but you didnt. Tell me a joke, anything. Either that or I’m really too sensitive to get annoyed over tiny things. I probably am. But I’m still oh so pissed with her. Worse still, Mdm Ng is acting like she agreed with every single word Ms Know-It-All uttered. Dont you have your own mind, Mdm Ng? At first you agreed with us; then come along a MsLong and you completely changed your words. AH, WHY LIKE THAT? I dont understand these teachers. And now, we got many things to edit because of her visit, not to mention many more researches to be done!

Speechless.

The stresses are finally coming, threatening to drain me dry when work already had. :(

And now, tomorrow is the launching of LS GSS. The First Big Day. Busy, busy, gonna be sooooo busy. I’m leading a busy life right now but it’s not the life I want. I hardly go out with friends anymore. The only lunches that we go together are lunches during schooltime; and we only gossiped about what shopping we had done with other people and not with one another. It’s like, in school we are - "Hey, we’re best of friends!"; but once the clocking-out hour arrives, we are - "Bye! See you tomorrow!" - and quickly disappear down the corner. I do that too, because I have to rush off to work; My friends do that too because they had something on. Mostly boyfriends issues. (Yes, I’m the only one currently not attached. Yay or nay? Haha!) So you see? It’s like our lives are split into two. I cant remember our last outing together. Probably in Year2. And I cant remember alot memories of us outside. All I can remember mostly are the times we spent in school doodling over lecture notes and staring blankly at computers. LOL. Pathetic or what?

Once you sit down and started pondering over this, you’ll realize. It just strucks you. I dont normally think such stuff to such extreme but I do now, because today is Emo Day. I truly missed the entire class. What fun we used to have. And yes, I’m saying these wistfully.

No one probably realized it but me. Maybe they think there’s no point, maybe it didnt matter to them. Then, ohwells. I’m being emo. :(

I was quiet throughout the beginning of work. When I arrived, they were all busy doing the setting of the shop for tomorrow’s GSS. It looked like the first opening of the shop where everything was slashed with.. everything. Racks jammed full, hangers not enough, basket filled to the brim. Ah.. I hate sights like these. Plus my emo mood, and plus my jaw still aches and I still winced at every twitch of my cheek muscles, I decide to remain mute. No interest in their conservations, no feelings for anything. For me, being emo is like I’m a walking statue. Outside I looked dead but inside my head, feelings/thoughts/words were flying left and right, zooming around like an aeroplane. Very depressed feeling.

Because I was thinking about work the next day.. and the next day.. and the next day. I truly have no life now.

But luckily, my mood begins to pick up about 2hours later. I even texted him how his day was, hoping his words could bring in some happiness. And indeed, he didnt disappoint me(: Hehe. And what makes a Happy Combo is that an item that I want will be 40% off! Whee!

Recently, I have this weird feeling. Scrolling down my list of contacts, it’s really kind of pathetic to say that there is not alot of people I would like to whine to when I’m feeling lonely and depressed. I never thought I was those anti-social kind of person but this weird feeling I had got me thinking - am I one? I loved to make friends. But I guess, at the right time, at the right place, at the right mood.

I’m so friends-deprived.

It had been 1year4months22days and I’m still thinking of you. What’s missing? I wonder. The sun still rises in the east and sets in the west. The moon still comes after the sun sets. The flowers still continue to bloom and did not die. Everyday is still a 24-hour routine. I still sleep on the top bunk bed. I still have long hair and didnt grow an inch. I still have my hello kitty blanket that I like to huddle underneath every night. So, what’s missing? You’re happy and I’m almost happy. I still went to school everyday at the same time and came home drained and dry every night. I’m still me. The same me that you left and the same me when we first met. So what’s the loss? The loss of you?

And the one word that came into my mind was..

Loneliness.

I chanced upon this when surfing blogs, and i do like this entry veryvery much (: It speaks!

The Ex-Snydrome
After being single for some time, some of us tend to think back about our past relationships, and perhaps fixate on one or two of our exes. This may even happen if you’re in a relationship, but maybe things aren’t going too well.

Our brain may trick us into thinking about a certain ex, and then suddenly, BAM! You realise that you may have let a good thing go, and BAM! You realise that you’re still in love with that ex.

But the question is - are you really in love with that ex? Or are you more in love with the time you were in love with that ex? Do you really miss that ex or do you miss the time when you were in heart-pounding-sweaty-palms-chockful-of-serotonin love? Do you miss the person or the emotion of it all?

They are two completely different things, but sometimes we get tricked into thinking they’re not.

Ok, maybe I didn’t articulate myself clearly, am rushing through this, but I think you get the gist of it.

Ya, so don’t be fooled ok?

10:28AM - In school

School feels kinda lonely somehow. Both girls are off to break. And my jaw still hurts at every twitch.

Kinda rhymes, huh? (:

Oh.. wait.

Just what am I smiling for? I’m veryvery much upset.

.. and hungry too.

MAC LATER!! :D My jaw is gonna suffer more for sure.

x

Today, I spent a total of $5.90 to get a hole (okay, 2 holes) poked for my belt. It was too loose for me, thus the need of more holes. Can you imagine? Just 2 teeny-weeny holes and I needed to spend over 5bucks to get it done. Pfffft. What really happened was, I went to Taliang, an accessory shop selling belts and, uh well, accessories. Since they sell belts too, any normal person will assume they got the punching-hole machine right? Yup, so i chose to go in, thinking the 2 ladies seems very nice. And as I’m a very nice person too, I decided i should get something in the shop before asking them nicely if they could help to poke my belt for me. I went to get 3 star clips for 1buck and when i went to pay, i saw that they have very nice earrings at the counter. You know, those that looks like crystal cubes and when shone under light, they sparkle off many colours? Very pretty, reminds me of the rainbow(: and the prism we learnt in secondary school. Simply dazzling under the lights. Heh, so i got that too, for another 2.90moolahs.

"Eh auntie, do you have the punching-hole machine?" I asked sweetly when paying up for the 3.90 worth of junk. I asked this question though i had already seen the small punching-hole thingy hanging behind her.

"No, we dont provide this kind of service." was curt reply after taking the money and stuffing my items into my hand.

@#$^&!@!!!

Help me punch a hole will die isit?! And as i walked out of the shop, I stared blindly at the stuff I had just purchased and do not need at all. And worse still, my aim of getting the items were not achieved. >:( The people these days are just plain selfish..

So nevermind, i went across to another shop selling the same stuff and started looking for stuff to buy again. :( It was another risk taken because who knows if the 2 women in the shop would act like the former one?! Nothing in the shop has what i liked so i just bought another pair of hoop earrings which i already have but this one has abit of a curly-wurly design. 2bucks. And this time, phew, I loved nice ladies. She helped me poked the holes, though it wasnt very nicely poked. But at least, it was poked.(:

So nice.. unlike the bitch at store number5 counting from the front of the chain. !@$%^$@#$

So, 5.90 gone like that.. and I ALREADY HAVE THOSE ITEMS AND I DONT NEED NEW ONES.  Just take it as stocking up, bahhh. Haha.

Oh and and, when i was walking over to take bus, the Coke Stand was there, and they were handling out free bottles of coke! Heh. Free drink who can resist? =X So I took one, unscrewed it, took a sip and..

Not nice one.. because it’s CokeLight! :( I was happy-ing away for nothing. And now the bottle is still 3.5/4 full, sitting in the refrigerator. So I board my bus home and I took a seat.. And there right in front of me were 5 women holding the same coke bottles. LOL. HAHAHAHAHA. Again, free things who can resist? Though not very nice.. Pepsi Twist is still the nicest :D

And when I woke up from my 1.5hours of nap just now, I peered into the fridge for something juicy to chew, and guess what i saw?

Another CokeLight bottle.

Jas’s. :D

WE LOVE FREE STUFF! X)

x

Friends. To me, this word meant alot. Friends are very important to me. I always fancied this thought that I will have the kind of friends that will be with me through every part and parcel of my life. We’ll matured together, have fun together, and different schools and lifestyles will not drive us apart. And then we’ll be at each other weddings, tossed one another’s bouquet of flowers together and grow old together. When we’re old, we’ll shared gardening tips and have high-teas frequently. :D So stupid right? Am I the only silly one here? Haha!

Anyway, I had this friend. We used to be very closed. (Actually I’ve come to realize I have many this kind of friend) Somehow, we grew apart. Maybe it’s the holidays too long, and we just drifted. Or many it’s very true when they say girls and guys can never be the best of friends. Now the ironic thing is, we see each other in school etc. But we wont greet, say hi or ask "how’s everything going?" Things just arent like it used to be. And of course I’m bothered or I wont be writing about it here. It just got me wondering, whatever happen to the memories that we shared? Whatever happen to the times we spent together? We talked through secrets, gave each other advices, teased and have fun together. Where had those moments gone to? Or have you forgotten?

At least I knew I havent.

What’s making me blogged about this is that today I passed by that place on my way home. That place where we were waiting for our bubble teas and you and me were squatting by the drain talking about love.

"Just because a person like you doesnt mean that you have to like him back, right?" I remembered asking.

I remembered those times you walked me home.
I remembered the last time we talked under my block, you were encouraging me to embark on an uncertain relationship.
I remembered us sitting outside 7-11, on the steps talking. You were eating a ready-made meal from 7-11. It was late at night and it just felt so nice, something friendly, something warm.
I remembered all those talks..
I remembered the time i fell asleep on your bed..

I missed this friendship, but all has gone wrong. It was like a flower blooming halfway, then died before it can blossom into something beautiful. Memories. It was those good times that i remembered, those soothing words that rang into my mind, and it was the purest of the friendship that I had missed. Something that gives no pressure, just gently pushing me on.

Friend, have you forgotten it all?

It really really hurts now. Should i take MC tomorrow?

I’m worried.

It even hurts when I’m just opening my mouth. And it had been days, a week even!

CRIES!

Phew, I hate editing.

News is, I’m back to Blogsome now! (: And I quite like this plainplain template now. Will tweak again when I.. feel like it :D Heh.

Tonight is a happy night once i thought how lovely tomorrow is gonna be. No work always means happy things! So, I’m happy. Work today was a draggggg with kiwi. Always. Low sales is always because of her. She simply enjoy eating up my sales that i dont bother making more anymore. It kinda like, wasting my time to give you commissons? Ugh, gah! So I was like, doodling lyrics and sad faces on the paper at the counter, and popping in and out of the storeroom many times to sip on my Macs vanilla milkshake. Which, by the way is a total LOVE. I heartheart Macs milkshakes now! They shall be my favourite drinks of the month. Simpy delicious - go try if you havent ogayyy! :D I’m dying to try the strawberry one! The choc and vanilla ones are very niceeeeee!

Hehe, new drink discovery. But milkshakes gets me fat, fatter than I’m already am. Sigh. But I need a happy motivation to push myself to work, so once in a while it’s okay? :) And also, it’s not very cheap - $2.20 a cup. It’s a indulgence, really.

kissing raindrops on your nose.

I found it very cute too =)

9:16AM

It’s a dreary morning today and I’m freezing right now. Is it the same for you at the other side?

I awoke with a start today, and only bro’s awake. How funny. Normally it’s Mommy or Da who woke me up. My teeth/jaw/cheek still hurts very much. I wonder why.. Could it seriously be toothache and the only person in the world to ease my pain are dentists?! NOOOOO, please dont do this to meeeeeeeeeeeee. I detest dentists, probably the same way as dentist detest digging dirt from my teeth. :( Sigh. I hope things will turn out fine - I dont wish to be bogay at this age!! Maybe when i’m 90+ years old then maybe cant help lahhh..

I’M FREEZING.

ohwells. Back to DeleteRecord!! :(

2:12PM

Anyways, just got back from lunchie(: and i’m feeling SOOOO BLOATED RIGHT NOW!! I seriously need to diet i think. SIP makes me fat, work makes me even fatter. I dont eat dinners when I worked, so i need to be kept full to last me through the night :( EAT NO MORE!!

What I’m doing right now:
Surfing blogs.
Listening to music online on imeem.com.
MSN Chatting
Giggling at jokediary

Now playing my favourite song of the day: Zhuan Shu Tian Shi by Tank

Speaking of Tank, I lurrve him okays! He’s terrific.(:

Right now, I’m still freezing, imagine I’m wearing a long-sleeved tee and my cardigan!! COLD OR WHAT? Hahahaha!

I’m just so bored lahhh. SIP - Slacking In Progress..

Now playing: Wo Ke Yi

2:32PM

Anyway, I must say that he is reallyreallyreallyREALLY getting on my nerves. Once, twice is probably okay; maybe i can take it that he is still adapting. But it’s almost 4years and i STILL hasnt seen any freaking change?! One moment it’s almost acceptable, taking care of baby and all that but the next.. !$#@!!!! Outside raining like freakily crazily and you have no eyes to see?!?! ISIT. She has to go work and you’re almost jobless and unemployed and shouldnt you be the one who bring baby to school? Bloody damn bastard. There arent any father genes in him that i can see. How i wished I can bang on the door and yell at him.. but i coward lah, he so big size:( But he is really pissing me off. Packed your suitcases and go back where you belong lah!! xxxxxxx!

*ANGRY*

Okay, now i really must get back and pretend to do some coding. =x

It’s really boringthehellouttame >:(

2:56PM

No one is talking to me on MSN and this makes me damn bored. Plus it’s break right now and I have no mood to go out. Too bloated to move, really. I only had fan choy with 2 siew mai and I’m so full already?!?! Oh, and plus the 1 dollar plate of fries and Ping and I shared. I wanna eat chocolate and candies but my jaw/cheek doesnt allows me to. I’m feeling so sick, full, puke-ish and I feel like sleeping.
I got so much to blog about, really. But I’m too full to. And you hardly have any privacy in the lab, though many are off to break already. And I’m munching orange peel right now! Whee.

3:26PM

I just fell asleep.. and woke up 5 minutes later. Or you can say i was jerk up by the stupid dream i had. Like really jerked up suddenly. And Dayah started laughing like mad beside me! LOL. She’s still laughing. oh, I’m very used to the fact that I’m becoming kind of like a clown these days.. Walking the wrong direction thinking I’m right, knocking on people thus shocking them thinking what had happen (It just happen to Ping just now - My arm knocked into hers when she was sleeping and she was shocked awake!!) and many more which i had conveniently forgotten about it.

It’s always like that, I always get woken up suddenly by my own jerks. :( Guess I was really tired?

Work later:(

I’m so bored right now that I went to search for M2M songs. I love them loads! When they disband a few years ago, i was so sad!

*The above was blogged during lab/school hours using wordpad(:

Oh my pretty pretty boy I love you
Like I never ever loved no one before you
Pretty pretty boy of mine
Just tell me you love me too
Oh my pretty pretty boy
I need you
Oh my pretty pretty boy I do
Let me inside
Make me stay right beside you

Okay, i’m soooooo fickle-minded. It’s back to square one! I dont know if I should use blogsome/wordpress. This shall be a test-test thing. Will see how! I’m just so sick of customizing my own. Tweaking can be very tiring too, believe it or not. And I’m really tired right now. I’m tired from school too, the load on my shoulders weighing me down and down everyday, and worse not able to head straight home after school. It’s just very.. exhausting? I dreamt of my bed every moment. I wonder did i really wished school could start soon during the holidays? Ugh. I’m taking those rubbish words back!! Tiredddd, and i’m sorry groupmates, that i’m not helping much in the website. Screw the MSDN Library!! :’( Well, tomorrow awaits. Wait, it is already tomorrow!

Read something worthy:

Go ahead, cry for the next few days. But you must pick yourself up sooner or later. He does not love you anymore. Face it. Stop deluding yourself. Who is he trying to kid? He gave up because he didn’t know how to make you happy? Since he claims that he still loves you, he would do whatever it takes to see you smile, & not just bail when the going gets tough.

Nobody said breaking up is easy. Trust me my love, when this period is over, you’ll realise how much stronger you’ve become. & I’ll be here with you all the way. We’ll all be.

Don’t do anything foolish to hurt yourself. He may feel guilty, but it will not make him love you again. He will only feel sorry for you. His presence is not going to make a difference since you’re no longer in his heart.

"Hey, let’s meet up after exams for facial okay? i know one that’s really goood!"

"Mommy, i have to treat you a meal at HK Cafe! Their egg fried rice is super nice!"

"Let’s go KBox one day! We’ve never go together yet!"

"Wanna go ice-skating again? Last time was fun!"

"One of these days, we must go clubbing together okay!! During the holidays! Let’s meet up."

"Oei, when we free lets hit the beach for some sun-tanning leh.."

"Meet up together for lunch in school one day hor!!"

"Movie marathon! I missed those! When when again?"

"One of these days, i bring you aboard.."

"Hey.. when free to meet up? Shopping!!"

"I treat you to dinner okay?"

"I still owe you pressies.."

"Next time k?"

"One day, i’ll tell Mommy that i love her. One day.."

"I forgot this time round, the next time i will."

x

So many plans left said and undone.. hanging in the air, like broken promises. Check your list. Is it as long as mine? Or shorter? I felt grief when i’m writing this. It’s as if the sandglass is turning every second and we sat by and do nothing with it, and as time take all these away, i wonder, just when will i actually do by what i SAID I WILL?

I’m scratching my head too.

i’m scared of regrets.

 

What if.. just what if one day i’ll just die without fullfilling those?

Have you ever think about what i’m thinking?

 

Just when will the "One of These Days" ever gonna come?

Hooray, sunday had arrived and it’s MOTHER’S DAY! Exciting or what?! Hurhurhur (:

Right now i’m feeling so full and bloated that i feel like puking my guts out! But dinner was fantastic, though i was annoyed at first but somehow, there’s this homey feeling about coming home together stinking of smoke and food. :D I must be crazy, but recently, i feel myself glowing when it comes to family issues. I LOVELOVELOVE my family alot! Nothing will change this fact. i never thought i was this homey a person.. until recently. Like, how i could enjoy a day out with my bro and sis, how we could joke over meals and hang out so comfortably together.. it clicks, and this made me a happy girl and I felt myself growing stronger when it comes to overcoming my fears, feelings and obstacles coming my way. <3!

I hope you enjoyed yourself today, Mommy(:! Mom and I get along really well - just as long as i dont piss her off by buying more clothes again!! ;)

Today was Flora’s last day. How sad is that? I wonder if we would continue to keep in contact.. a short span of 1 month plus we had knew each other, but somehow, this friendship clicks too. Now Flora, who am i gonna complain to if i get pissed off with kiwi again? :(

Sigh! Nevertheless, if i see her in school, i would definitely jumped up in joy and greeted her merrily. Heh.

x

It always seems like i got so much to blog about but.. it’s hard to put it in words?

Hmm.. this weird uneasy feeling i’m having right now..

DAMN IT!!!

 

Screw it lahhh, tomorrow will be another day.

So cheer up, let down your hair, and concentrate on being happy!

 

Yes, i should start taking my own advice for once.

Yay, I’m happy today!

Spidey3 is LOVE! =D LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVEEEEE! i love the show, i love harry, i love spidey, i lovelovelove the part where they fight together! So cool can! :D But i hatehatehate the part where Harry dies.. AND i actually teared over that part and the part where they thought back about Uncle Ben. =( So sad! Sniffsniff. Lucky for the pair of free tickets =D, we only paid for hao’s one! Hehe. We had Mac’s, KFC, and BK.. Yakun and bubble tea! Like pig. =x and YAY, i finally got my eyebrows tweezed - it’s sucha great feeling, dont ask my why. Haha, it just feels gooooooodddd!

I’m reallyreally happy today! =)

but my cheek/jaw still hurts.. =(

x

2hearts;

Here I go again I promised myself ;
I wouldn’t think of you today ;
It’s been one year more and counting ;
You’ve moved on, I still feel exactly the same ;
It’s just that everywhere I go ;
All the buildings know your name ;
Like photographs and memories of love ;
Steel and granite reminders ;
The city calls your name and I can’t move on ;

Ever since you’ve been gone ;
The lights go out the same ;
The only difference is you call another name ;
To your love, to your lover now ;
To your love, the lover after me ;

Am I all alone in the universe? ;
There’s no love on these streets ;
I have given mine away to a world that didn’t want it anyway ;
So this is my new freedom ;
It’s funny I don’t remember being chained ;
But nothing seems to make sense anymore ;
Without you I’m always twenty minutes late ;

And as time goes by so slowly ;
The nights are cold and lonely ;
I shouldn’t be holding on ;
But I’m still holding on for you ;

"What goes around, comes around."

This was what kakak was saying today, when talking about her ex-husband. And somehow, it felt so true. I believed in it too. The same thing that you did to other people, beware it might backfire and shot you too. (:

She doesnt mention her ex-husband very frequently, but just now, she talked about it a little when a chubby looking guy came knocking at our closed metal door, grinning at her. I supposed that that was the guy she was telling Flora and me about a few weeks ago. The younger guy who has a crush on her. Haha! I found it real sweet somehow..

"You know, I attract fat guys." She told me after the guy left. "My ex-husband used to be really really fat. But i coaxed him to slim down and change his image from head to toe. That’s when he grew handsomer and started flirting around."

This man have to be a shithead. Shouldnt you learn to appreciate a woman who changed you for the better and loved her more? I dont understand. Disbelief and pure disgust were written over my face when i heard those words. "Then he dont deserve you." I finally said. I was really really disgusted. Do you call a man like that a man? He should have his brain cells checked.

"Fat guys are better! They’re nice to hug." Hehe. Yes, i said that.

"Yeah, like teletubbies eh?" She imitated a gorilla walking.

"Haha! The fatter the better! At least you know they dont judge people by the covers." I continued. Which makes me ponder if i should start looking out for chubbier guys instead.

Intro anyone?

Anyways, i felt really sad for kakak. Somehow, i cared because i really liked her. She’s super nice and pretty and she deserved to be happy. I hope that she have her fill of fun tonight with Mr Teletubby! (:

And oh did i mention how sweaty i’ve gotten even in this rainy weather today? All because of tantan!! At 4pm, he forced everyone out of the lab for a run at Bedok Reservoir. Crazy or what?! And yes, this was the reason why i was chatting with you halfway and i went MIA. GRR! What "you guys need to exercise and keep fit due to staying all day in the lab"! At first it started drizzling a little, and we retreated back into the canteen by his orders. THEN THE RAIN HAS TO STOP! and we had no excuse but to drag our lazy asses to the BR. )): Very ke lian right? Imagine the weather after the drizzle.. HOTHOTHOT! >:( i gotten myself all sweaty and stinky and hot lahhhh. Pfffft.

Alright, the third week of school is over and Ping, Dayah and I are veryveryveryveryvery the stressed..

Worse, we predicted that it will keep adding on..

!!!!!!!

Pfffft, editing is sure a sweaty task! i’m going crazy with all the codes jumping in front me lahhh, gah! :(

this is the first post of a brand new start, a new beginning. i’m leaving the sad sad story and moving on with a fresh start.

well, wish me luck! (:

and..

HELLO WORLD! :D